unfiltered mom tears

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Why is it that I have water running down my face again ? That’s right one of my kids is experiencing another life moment and I am a hot mess. Last night brought the water works at our sons 6th grade graduation. My tears started early on in the program during the principals speech . The tears continued through the presentation of the graduation certificates and really kicked in during the slideshow not to mention the extra tears when his teacher spoke about his class , I’m pretty sure they may be some of her favorites. As I sat there a movie was playing in my head of Jack at his first day of preschool when he didn’t want to let go of my hand , his big blue eyes filled up with tears while he looked up at me asking me to stay. The movie continued all through elementary school the first day drop offs changed as he grew , he wasn’t holding my hand anymore but running out of the van to catch up with his friends and start a new year . Yes, there was mom tears the first time he didn’t want me to walk him up but those tears were of pride for my son . When he didn’t need me to walk him up it meant he was solid , he could stand on his own .

As a mom we have tears for everything , we cry out of frustration, sadness, worry, anger, pride, celebration and love . All the tears really come from the same place and that’s love. I’m sure most of you would agree that our kids are the only people that we can want to strangle one minute and in the next breath lift a car off of if needed and then kiss the boo boo. This love we have for our children isn’t just biology because I have an adopted child and I feel the exact same about him as I do the ones I carried it is something primal. Cue the Tarzan call ….. sorry I always imagine Tarzan swinging through the jungle when I say primal .  I will admit my kids have me on an emotional roller coaster everyday living with a teen , tween and a daughter who I’m pretty sure changes age hourly plus I’m in pre- pre menopause, my husband never knows what he will walk into after work. I know that not all mom’s are like me some women don’t cry or maybe it’s really they don’t cry in front of others . I have a friend who is a free crier ,( yes I just made up that name) I thought she was over doing it when our sons were younger but then I got out of my judging head and realized I was not letting myself be in the moment to be naked with my own emotions. Since that day the tears have been flowing with gusto. Thank you Michelle for being you and letting me be naked .

2 thoughts on “unfiltered mom tears

  1. Mindi- I can’t make it thru a “soaring skills celebration” or a damn spring music concert without tearing up. It doesn’t even have to be MY kid up there. I’m just a big mushy mess. If I think hard about why I get so emotional the internet would pause for a split second, shake its head and then move on. But I’m definitely aware of why. Dare I say #blessed and make you puke? 🙂

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